***SPOILERS***
He-Man: The Eternity
War #4–6 (DC) are written by Dan Abnett and illustrated by Pop Mhan. Here,
She-Ra has a showdown with Hordak, Skeletor returns, and Space Boots He-Man sees
a vision of the future in which he becomes a brutal dictator.
The characterizations continue to be extremely weak. The
only interesting character here is Skeletor, because he’s the only one with any
personality; that is, he’s the only one who isn’t a pretentious speechifying
cardboard cutout.
We get a little bit more lore here, and in a very palatable
dose. The implication, however, is terrifying: the religion of this Eternia is one in which the goddess seems to be whatever the ruling party
wants her to be. That’s one small step away from Lovecraftian horror, and that
shows you exactly how misguided this series continues to be.
We are explicitly told that this is a parallel universe to
the Eternia(s) I care about, the one(s) I have loved since childhood (although
the iPhone game?! Really?!). That does make me unclench my buttocks a little
bit, but it also underscores the fact that bleak Lovecraftian Eternia is a
weak-sauce universe, and I for one would much prefer to be back in one of the better
ones. Nothing to be done for it, alas.
While it fits in this world, from a broader perspective,
He-Man-as-evil-dictator is a laughable premise, one that’s impossible to take
seriously. Nevertheless, it’s used as a hypothetical here to decent effect.
Mhan’s art is solid as usual, but we’re reminded again just
how bad the designs of Skeletor’s warriors are. Hordak, the Evil Warriors,
She-Ra, He-Man—it’s just bad character designs across the board these days. There
are also flashes here of what I called the “techy and off-putting designs” at
the end of The Art of He-Man, plus
that Battle Cat person, which has me bracing myself in expectation of this
property taking a turn for the severe worse (I mean, honestly, as disappointing
as this grim and gritty version of He-Man has been, who thinks grim and gritty
New Adventures would be any better?).
As the covers of these issues clearly indicate and as their
contents confirm, these still aren’t remotely close to being comics you can
share with your kids. As someone who has derived a great deal of pleasure from indoctrinating
my small children with a passionate love for the old Filmation cartoons, this
continues to be profoundly disappointing (This is the last time I complain about this, I promise. It’s not going to change; I know that.).
In short, in spite of the many things they do badly, a coherent
if unimpressive story and a decently interesting and much-needed plot turn at
the end of #6 keep these issues afloat.
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT
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